Stuff That Happens
I Went to the Gym
(it didn't go well)
After a long winter of consuming as if I were about to hibernate, I decided to join the gym to shed excess pounds for the wedding.
People often say that Christmas is not the same once Santa ceases to exist. Christmases cannot simply be broken into ones with Santa and without. There is a much longer progression from childhood Christmases to adult ones that take in various different stages.
How many of you have made a shitty sandwich before going to bed, placed it in the fridge and then went to work without it the following morning? Everyone. But what about when it's a special lunch?
This week, a previously unknown phenomenon swept across the Greater Boston area as myself and Christina went out and about to run a few errands. The sun crept out from a freshly-relieved cloud following the mother-and-father of all thunderstorms, bringing with it a rainbow that streaked somewhat majestically across the sky. People lost their shit.
Yesterday, Christina graduated with her MBA from UMass, Boston after a very long time in college. It was a proud day for all concerned, but one that I was also dreading for sweat-related reasons.
Last year before I went to Uganda, I needed to get a number of shots and vaccinations. In order to do this, I needed my medical records which were quite thin. Aside from a couple stitches, my knee operation, and a bout of tonsillitis, my records were spotless - until I got back to my early childhood.
Every now and then in man's life, a story comes along that is so brilliant that everyone needs to hear it. In my case it is much less frequent that such a story would paint me in a better light than another person in the story. This is one such occasion.
I have never claimed to be a particularly good Catholic. I have been in America all of 18 months and finally "went to church" for the first time. I decided that it might be a good idea to live tweet the ordeal.
Getting a haircut, for me, is worse than getting a rectal exam. I would gladly have a strange man poke around inside than root around on top. At least everyone knows their place in that scenario.
New Year's Day is traditionally one of the last days before Christmas cheer and joy becomes crippling depression and failed self improvement. People think this is a good time to make resolutions.
My most sincere and heartfelt apologies that this is the longest blog post in history. It was originally split into six parts but you are either going to read it all or you are not, so it may as well all be in the one place.
I'm not entirely sure what it is about me but I just have to assume that everyone is inherently evil and completely different to any other human being I've met, just because I haven't met them.
RAG Week is a time for students to act the bollocks even more so than usual, to drink more than an older adult could possibly comprehend, and to have more craic than was previously thought possible. What about when you are no longer a student? Does the idea of RAG Week hold any appeal any more?
I have the uncanny, unnatural, unerring ability to both swim (not well but I can get from one part of the swimming pool to another part 15-20 yards away without touching the tiles) and sink (picture a four year old child having been ejected from a capsized boat in shark-infested waters after a shark ate his father and punctured the little child's life-jacket).
Holidays can very often fall apart on the most minuscule of things. Weekends away are very much the same, but depending on the mindsets of the individuals involved, these "most minuscule of things" can also, very often, come to be what the holiday/weekend away is remembered for.